by Spencer Hicks
It’s like my dad always said, “In utero, no one can hear you scream.” Did I mention my dad was an abortion doctor? It’s true, he went to abortion school and got his doctorate. He learned that “screaming” tidbit, day one.
Sorry, I’m a liar. But my wife is pregnant and we are expecting a son. I’m excited about it, and also scared shitless.
A lot happens in the time leading up to the birth of your first child, and I would like to give the non-parents a heads-up of what to expect.
Pregnancy Progression Pics
Thanks to Instagram, your wife will post a weekly picture of herself as the baby grows. Have you ever watched a .gif of someone who takes a weekly picture of themselves as they go through a new exercise routine? It’s the opposite of that. You can watch the love of your life’s body get destroyed by a child you will love unconditionally. All the CrossFit in the world won’t fix that.
Little Tiny Brain’s resident tall person, Spencer Hicks wrote and appeared in this Joe Cappa directed short masterpiece. The film also stars honorary Little Tiny Brainer Matthew Alvin Brown, who is way more talented than all of Little Tiny Brain combined.